The Doppenberg's in Guatemala….

Its been a little bit since I’ve had the time to actually sit down and write…. it’s funny how busy life can get.  My boys are home for the summer… and I love that.  It’s a part of what I love so much about our time in Guatemala, family time.  We spend every waking moment together there and it seems without much in the way of bickering.  Life here in the Canada Doppenberg world is different.  Seems the more we have, the more discontent we can become.  Living simple in Guatemala strips us of that feeling of discontent and our world just spins so much better.

I had the privilege of visiting Bob a week ago.  Bob was in Guatemala at the same time as us last year and we got to know him quite well.  Shortly after his trip to Guatemala Bob was involved in what he calls… “The Incident”.  The incident was no less than a circumstance that took him from a healthy, newly retired man with dreams of full time mission work to a quadriplegic in a matter of seconds.  His life was completely altered by one fateful wave in a very powerful ocean.  Its been months since the “incident” and this was the first time I had opportunity to visit him in ICU where he remains indefinitely.  His injury was very complete… his neck broken and he will be on a ventilator for the rest of his life on top of his inability to move.  He normally tires after speaking for a few minutes but during this visit he was able to speak with passion, and strength for over 2 hours as he told me a story.  I won’t go into detail of his story here, as I could never do it justice and it is my prayer that someday Bob will leave ICU, return home and be able to tell others his ‘story’ in his own words as it was meant to be told.   Suffice it to say that by the end of his tale I was in tears… tears of awe… at the power and strength of the human spirit when it is filled with God.   Bob refers to his incident as such because he said with God, there is no accidents…. God has a plan for Bob… this is part of that plan as difficult as it may be for us to accept… it is a beautiful plan none the less and I feel it was a gift directly from God to me to have heard it at a time I really needed to hear it.

I had been in a funk of sorts before my visit with Bob.  I was questioning everything.  Feeling very sorry for myself… Guatemala seemed so far away and the calling that my family feels was distant to me.  There was so much work to be done here to put this ministry into full motion and the vision we had became buried under paperwork and worldly rhetoric and what I felt to be simply crazy at times.  I had lost focus and become discouraged.  Not anymore!  God refreshed me through Bob… Basically slapped me upside the head and told me to suck it up and remember why I am being called to do this and exactly BY WHOM Im being called.   Trust me when I say, its a humbling experience to be slapped up the head like this by your Creator in such a blatant fashion.

Now word has come from Guatemala… Heavy rains, much worse than other years are devastating the area of Jutiapa.  The area has such urgent need right now because of the rain.  Fernando & his family have asked for prayer as things are becoming more and more dangerous every moment.  At the hospital Marquito continues to be on medication in preparation for surgery soon.  There are as of yesterday 15 sick, malnourished children being cared for at the Hospital Infantil Padre Pedro.  That number could increase dramatically as the rains continue to make food and work even more scarce in the mountains.   There are 25 young girls living and studying there.  When you add the Hermana’s (sister’s) into that mix there are approximately 50 people living there right now!  That is a huge number and they are desperate for food, medicine and supplies.  This always puts things into perspective for me as well…. Imagine living with 50 others, some of whom are very ill and not having the money, nor resources to care for any.  That is a scary place to be.   This is what makes me sit and push through that paperwork I find myself so buried under for the ministry.  It is no longer rhetoric or crazy… it is a lifeline for people… a voice for those that are screaming but are not heard by most.  God is magnifying those screams, using my family and people in our ministry to do so…. and will continue to do so until they are heard.

Money is a funny thing…. so necessary in our work and yet something we have, up until this point had a very hard time asking for.  I always played down the need for money in our ministry… I was always afraid of making people feel guilty.  But I am beginning to understand the concept in the world of the missionary of the “Go’er” and the “Sender”.   We are willing to ‘go’… but unless there are those that are willing to ‘send’ nothing will happen.  People are always looking for ways to help but cannot go…. what they don’t realize is that they can send!    Since meeting with Bob, hearing his story, doing some major internal thinking and reflection,  I am renewed in my energy do whatever is necessary to Go.  It has nothing to do with guilt, and if people feel guilty, that is their own internal struggle.  This is about something much bigger than guilt… It is about the privilege of being able to be a part of something big that God is doing in the world.  Our first major mail out is sitting in front of me on the table.  We have plowed through the paperwork and this afternoon the fruits of our efforts of the past weeks will be sent.  The mail out that makes us vulnerable,  puts our family out there and tells people we are willing to “Go”…. We pray now that God touches hearts and that there are many that are willing to “Send” because the stakes are very high and lives depend on it…. But as my tag line above says, “if our God is with us, then what could stand against?…” and I truly believe that with all my heart and soul.   God Bless & please continue to pray for the people of Guatemala during this harsh rainy season.

A little one being fed at the Hospital Infantil

A group of kids at dinner time

Part of our team in 2011 spending a morning on the mountain with Bob who is seated in the left bottom of the picture in the gray sweatshirt.

Yup, Im tearful again…. but not for the reasons that you think…. This time it is a joy so deep and so total that it has brought tears to my eyes.  I want you to go back, back with me to a time a few months ago when I wrote my blog entry “Twinkle, Twinkle, little star..” .  If you haven’t read it, then please go do so now if you have time, if not I will tell you it was by far the hardest thing I have ever written.  It was about a misunderstanding of epic proportions that was caused both by a language barrier and by humanness.  Estuardo was my boy.  My figurehead… he, for me, encompassed everything “Guatemala”.  He was the first boy I met at the Hospital and he changed my life forever.  He was so severely malnourished that his 17 year old body looked like that of an 8 year old, he was mentally challenged and unable to move, communicate etc etc.  All he could do was stare at the time I met him.  He shattered my heart.  He became a symbol to me of everything that was wrong and broken in this world.  And after being back in Canada for several months and not hearing any news on him, we returned to Guatemala.  I was thrilled to be back and looking forward to seeing “my boy”…. But my boy was “home”…. Home is quite the word…. it means different things, in different contexts.  This time it meant quite simply, as Mario put it…. dead.  The pain was intense, severe and overwhelming for me.  But looking back upon old journals, videos and my blog I know that “home” means quite simply…. ‘with Jesus’.   That IS the Good News!

The day I learned of Estuardo’s passing, my family and Rachel (a beautiful, then 15yr old girl from the youth group I lead) met another incredible young boy by the name of Marcos Cruz Cruz, nicknamed Marquito (little Marcos).  This boy touched us all but especially Rachel.  It was an emotional day for us all… I was crying with sorrow over Estuardo and we saw this little body in a crib.  The sight of Marquito is shocking to say the least.  I am putting a picture at the end of this post, but I must warn you, it is not easy to look at.  But I feel I need you to see with your own eyes… so you can understand with your heart.  Marquito captured our hearts…. but especially the heart of that amazing 15year old girl, Rachel….  Marquito is Rachel’s, Estuardo.  We all have an “Estuardo”… whether it be in Guatemala or Canada, or anywhere…. You know, the one person that touches us so deeply inside of ourselves that it basically turns our world upside down.  Some people have been fortunate enough to meet their Estuardo… some are still looking…. I feel very blessed to have found mine and sometimes when I get down or overwhelmed by things I can almost feel him cheering me on from Heaven!

Upon returning home, Rachel immediately went into action trying to raise money for a series of major operations that Marquito is in desperate need of.  You see, he is blind, has a very severe case of cleft palate and a myriad of internal problems.  She began selling homemade wallets and then decided to have a fundraiser, instead of a sweet 16 birthday party!  No gifts, just money raised for this precious 3yr old boy (who looks perhaps 9 months old), halfway across the world.  The rest of my youth group girls rallied around Rachel and her cause, as did the rest of the youth from our Church.  It was a beautiful thing to watch unfold and I have to say I am so proud of my girls, quite frankly they rock and I am so honoured to be their leader.  Rachel raised over $2000.00 toward the operations!  And was ready to wire the money immediately, but I hadn’t heard news from Guatemala yet on his condition so I called.  Fernando translating for me broke the news from Hermana Mercedes as gently as he could…. Marquito was gravely ill.  And the doctors were continuing to assess the worth and chance for success  on Marquito.  No operations right now.  I prepared myself to tell Rachel….

The reality of serving at a malnutrition hospital in Guatemala is they rehabilitate children… but sometimes the children are too far gone to be rehabilitated and they die.  Our humanity mourns for them but we continue to move forward.  I once a few months ago had someone remark to me after seeing pictures of Marquito, “You are seriously going to raise money and spend it on him?  If I donate, my money will go to that?  Why? He has no shot at a normal life.  Not to sound brutal but wouldn’t the money be better spent on someone with a better chance at a future?”   Im not sure if that is a common question…. or maybe its a common ‘thought’, that one feels so shameful thinking that its not often expressed.  Believe me, I understand that question.  My answer is simply, yes, we are going to spend the money on this child, and every other child like him that is put before us.  God made Marquito, and he is beautiful because of God.  It is not for us to decide whether his purpose on this earth is less worthy than that of another child.  Marquito laughs, cry’s and feels just like every other person on this planet.  What if this was your child?  Would you ask the same question?  He is a shining star, still on this earth just like Estuardo is a shining star now in Heaven and we are going to do what God commissioned us to do, help.  End of story!

The bottom line is that after months of praying, hoping, wishing and praying more we got a special letter from Hermana Mercedes last night that has me all teary, ever since reading it…. It’s about Marquito’s condition…. He is on medication right now to prepare him for his first surgery!!!!  Praise God, its going to happen… He is going to get the surgeries he needs.  The outcome is unknown, as is Marquito’s future… that is up to God…. whats up to us, our partners, and the people who inhabit this planet is to see that we give the Marquito’s, Estuardo’s, and all the others like them the same chance as we have to shine.  This is where the money we raise goes, every penny, and we will never apologize for that, in fact we will shout it from the rooftops if we think it can help save one little precious child….. Who know’s what their purpose is on this planet… it’s not for us to say, and its certainly not for us to pick and choose who we help… All we do is help and for us its a big part of the Good News!

My shining star Estuardo.... Godspeed little one...

Precious little Marquito

Our family & Hermana Mercedes, Hermana Veronica & Elmer at the Hospital Infantil Padre Pedro

Our family with the Hermana's enjoying dinner at Senor Chico, Senora Vilma & Fernando's home

Our family & Rachel serving in the mountains, having a blast with the kids!

Our group in Texas- The CTEN staff missionaries and other missionaries serving all over the world!

Greetings everyone!  It’s been a while and I’ve missed writing my blog.. mainly because I miss being in Guatemala and that is normally when I write.  I have decided,  since our ministry in Guatemala evolved into a full time ministry (even though we are not physically there full time…. yet) I am going to write… yes, even from Canada!  Having Fernando and his parents Senor Chico and Senora Vilma working in Guatemala on our behalf with the Hermana’s has been a gift from God.  We are able to run our ministry from here, via skype, email, phone etc., and they are on the ground serving tirelessly in Guatemala in partnership with us and our ministry!

Lots of things have been falling into place for us lately.  I have returned to University to get my degree in Nutritional Medicine.  Eventually I want to focus on pediatric malnutrition and allergies.  If you have been following my blog, you may remember a post around 16 months ago that totally reflected this desire.  Now here I am doing it, finally!  I have wanted this, long before Guatemala… 16 years ago when my son Zack was diagnosed with life threatening food allergies…. and now I see how this was all part of a plan formulated long ago.  Something I never understood the ‘why’ of is so clear to me now.  Well, I never was much for believing in coincidences anyway…. =)

The most exciting news is….. We have been accepted into Commission to Every Nation (CTEN).  A non-profit organization that helps independent missionaries, with unique visions to be just that, independent missionaries with unique visions!  Through CTEN we will get support… through prayer, tax receipts for donors, availability to set up one time and monthly recurring donations, personal support, ministry support, connections with other missionaries…. well you get the idea… they SUPPORT us in every way imaginable and for that we are thankful.  We recently spent a few days in Texas at the CTEN headquarters for some training/orientation.  The experience was beyond words.  I was at a point in my life where I was becoming overwhelmed and disheartened with our mission… it all seemed so beyond the scope of what we, a mere family, could do.  The wonderful missionaries at CTEN renewed my spirit and my faith that “if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us… and if our God is with us, then what could stand against…”.  Geoff and I left CTEN, re-energized and on fire again… sadly it was a quality we had begun to lack due to so many obstacles we simply could not get past.

Finally we understand that it is God’s job to do a vast majority of our ministry, especially when it comes to working in people’s hearts.  As a wonderful missionary Wes Peterson from CTEN, put it, our job is to Tell People & to Love People.  So simple and yet something that Geoff and I, being guilty of pride, never really understood.  We thought that God had put a desire on our hearts and it was up to us to do everything.  And sadly we thought we could do everything, and were struggling like you couldn’t imagine.  How crazy… and thinking about it, its no wonder we were disheartened and feeling overwhelmed… We can never do God’s job!

There is so much still up in the air in our lives.  We plan to go to Guatemala for 4-5 months this winter.  The Hermana’s and Fernando’s family have invited us for Christmas.  We will be definitely going, we wouldn’t miss that for the world.  If it was up to me (and Geoff), I know we would go and not come back to Canada.  However, things seem to be strangely out of place and it seems to us right now that its not the right time yet.  It is what we want but all the signs point to us going for 5 months, coming back and being patient.  Its as though God is saying, “the time is not yet… be patient….”.   Patience is a virtue, but unfortunately its not one that is high on my strengths list.  I am impatient… I am a do-er… not a wait-er.  But I am learning…. slowly <sigh>.  The not knowing is the hardest part for me.  We don’t know when we will be led to live in Guatemala full time… we don’t know whats to become of our lives and our business here…. we don’t know how our fundraising efforts will turn out…. we don’t know much, and being in a sort of not-knowing limbo is personally quite frustrating for me at times. To be blunt, I am freaking out at times.   Besides being impatient, I am a control freak.  I need to know things, even little things.  As a matter of fact I drive Geoff nutty because I need to know exactly what time he will be home on a certain day.  Even when it really doesn’t matter, I just simply need to know.  Once again, I am learning…. slowly <sigh>…

One thing I do know is that working for CTEN is the perfect fit for us.  The benefits to our vision will be immense.  I am so excited for the future and despite myself and my shortcomings, I am actually finding myself enjoying the excitement of not knowing what wonderful thing God is going to surprise us with next!

I have used the word vision a ton in this blog…. I guess it might be wise to let you know what that is.  It’s basically a statement that has been changed and formed over the past year.  What we hope to accomplish… the mission that has been placed in our hearts so to speak.  If you’ve read the previous blogs you will see it… subtly shining through each post until finally,  we have been able to put it into words in one statement:

Our vision is two-fold.  To help abolish malnourishment beginning in the Jutiapa & Jalapa regions through agricultural education & training AND to help educate and empower the next generation of youth & young adults in Canada to develop their hearts and minds for service in developing countries.

There it is… in a nice neat few lines…. seems simple enough.  After all, Geoff is able to fix, repair, build etc to get the hospital up to par.  I am studying nutrition… and we both are heavily involved in youth and young adult ministry here in Canada…. Simple.  And yet, with just our family it is impossible to achieve.  We need God, and we need CTEN, and we need supporters (financial, prayer, volunteers etc).  Ordinary people can achieve the extraordinary when they partner together.  There is great strength in numbers!!!

So yes, we will be asking people for financial support… Either a special gift or especially a recurring monthly partnership.  If we happen to ask, and it is not on your heart to donate, that is totally ok.  Prayer is the most important part so we simply ask that you pray for us, our ministry, the people of Guatemala and other missionaries and the people they serve around the world.  Volunteering is crucial too.  Without people on the ground working, it is all for nothing.  Fundraising is key but it is not easy and is for us, the hardest part.  It seems to feel as though you are bugging people.  But as we heard someone say recently, “Everything we have belongs to God anyway, so its ok to ask people to give some back to Him.  He will lead them and their hearts to do what He wants them to do and if its not with you and your ministry that is totally fine, He has other plans for them”.   What a great inspiration this was to us.  Now we feel we can ask people and know that it’s in God’s hands, not ours.  We will however work tirelessly to try and raise volunteers and money to help see the vision we have on our hearts come to fruition.  We feel it is our obligation and one of the many facets of what we have to do to see His kingdom come, His will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven….

Check us out at :  http://www.ctenc.ca/ritadoppenberg/

Email me for further information at:  ritadoppenberg@cten.org

Dios los Bendiga

Here I am again… I am home and its time to write the rest of my blog. I sincerely wish that I could bring each and every person who takes the time to read my thoughts down to Guatemala…. words simply don’t do any of it justice… but for now this will have to do.

I have a question… What does the word 200 mean to you? Is it a large number? A small one? In our North American society 200 isn’t necessarily a large number especially in terms of money, or people. If I were to say I’d give you $200.00, it really wouldn’t mean much…. What is that, a dinner at the Keg? If I said that there were 200 people at an event that number would seem kinda small…. But how about if I were to tell you that the Hospital Infantil Padre Pedro rehabilitated 200 children last year? Children that would have otherwise died…. that number takes on a whole new meaning doesn’t it?! Want to know something else… if they had more money they could have helped more. Many, many more… Children have died because they simply did not have the money to help… How’s that for perspective?

To give you some background here on Hermana Mercedes and the Hospital that we found out during our 3 hour meeting with them…. I feel its necessary for you to know….

Sister Hermana Mercedes is from Nicaragua. She studied medicine in Spain. Padre Pedro Martinez Cano wrote her a letter 28 years ago during her time in Spain asking her if she would come to Guatemala to aid him in helping children that were dying from Malnutrition in rapid numbers during the civil war in Guatemala in the early 80’s. After much prayer Hermana Mercedes decided to come but by the time she arrived in Guatemala Padre Pedro was dead. Someone did something to the car he was driving and he died in a crash. He was murdered by the very nation he devoted his life to helping. Radicals simply did not want certain Guatemalteco’s to live and multiply. Hermana Mercedes decided to carry on the Padre’s work. Someone donated the land that now houses the Hospital Infantil Padre Pedro to Hermana Mercedes to set up. At first it was just her and people began dropping children off in startling numbers. Imagine you, JUST YOU, looking after 40 dying children. What would that look like? Sleep was not an option and she tirelessly worked to save lives.

A few days after our meeting we met and drove with the sisters from the Hospital to the mountains of Jutiapa. It was a trecherous drive uphill that took just under 1 hour. Hermana Mercedes explained that back in the first days she would walk that distance several times a week (she could not afford a car nor a horse) to visit and nurse the people up there that were too sick to make the trip themselves. We were all stunned because I can only imagine making that walk. It must have taken her most of the day and she had much work to do after that exhausting walk! We were tired and worn out just from the last bit of the trip that we had to climb on foot once the road became impassable by car!!! After some time of doing this, word got out and gradually other sisters came to help and her new Order was formed. They are lead by her and she trains them. Hermana Mercedes has a Masters of Medicine and is filled with a spirit that I can only stand back from afar and admire with all my heart and soul.

Our trip up that mountain was amazing. We met the first family that Hermana Mercedes met 28 years ago on her walks up there. They were such a wonderful family. We presented the eldest woman there, the Abuela (grandmother) with a blanket and some hats that Geoff’s mom made. They were so thankful. Then it was off to visit a family that Hermana Mercedes hoped we could help. Up we climbed with little barefoot children following us. We could hear them giggling from the trees that lined our path. One look at this family and their home and Geoff and I began talking. Within a few minutes of talking with this family and Hermana Mercedes Geoff was digging in his pockets to give money to help. We paid for the bricks to finish building an adobe home that the man had begun to house him, his wife and their 7 children. If this home is not completed before the rains come all his hard work will be simply washed away in the mud. We also promised to return later that day with the lamina roofing he needed. The house must have a roof asap because an earthquake earlier in the week (we did not feel it but they are common almost daily occurances in Guate) already bowed the walls terribly. It was an incredible trip… Upon walking further down the path to visit some others we heard yelling behind us. It was the family running toward us holding a big pot, cups and a bag. They had made us coffee and brought us sweetbreads. It was such a touching moment standing on that path drinking with them and eating knowing the effort it took them to climb and run to us and the fact that they were sharing with us something that is life to them. They sell the coffee and it is their only means of money. I normally do not drink coffee but I will tell you I did drink this and it was the best thing I have ever had because I knew the love and respect that went into making it for us. Being here was such an honour.

After our visit up the mountain we had a quick lunch that the Hermana’s prepared for us. Then it was back up the mountain to deliver the lamina roofing. This day was truly incredible for my family and it simply solidified our feeling that we are being called to the El Progresso/ Jutiapa area even more. The help they need both on that mountain and at the Nutrition Hospital is so evident to us. Things here have fallen so in to place that I truly believe this is where we are supposed to be. To put it into perspective…. Some of the nuns work, cooking and cleaning outside the hospital and the money they make gets put back into the Order for the running of the hospital. But it is not much money. El Progreso hosts a run annually… similar to the Terry Fox run that happens here. Last year they raised $11,000.00 Quetzals… That is just over $1000.00 dollars…. Local boys bring $500.00 Q every month…. Monsignor Julio from Jalapa has provided $25,000.00 Q twice in the last 8 years for milk… These amounts are quite frankly insane they are so low. They saved the lives of 200 children last year and the cost for this is staggering. Medicines, food, and other provisions cost money and they have none! Children like little Marcos Cruz Cruz that are there right now, wait for operations that require large sums of money… One look at the precious faces of these children and you cannot help but cry for them. Things should be easier… they should be automatic… If Marcos needs an operation for cleft palate it should be done, period! Unfortunately that is not how the world works and the Hermana’s accept that and wait patiently and pray. They are severely in debt and we feel that we need to help. Put simply if the Order had more money they could save more children…. I personally want to help get that number of 200 raised much, much higher and my family and I are making it our mission in life to do so! Wouldn’t it be something to read this blog next year and see that number higher? Into the thousands some day perhaps?

We left that meeting with the Hermana’s with a list. A very long list of things that they desperately need. Things like a 4×4 SUV to get them up into the remote mountain areas to transport the sick & dying children back to the hospital…. Building renovations… roofing… food…. medicine…. money for operations for children that need it…. Its a huge list and quite frankly a bit overwhelming…. The Hospital Infantil Padre Pedro has other costs as well….many of the costs were things we never thought of. Some of the children who are rehabilitated decide to join the Order… also some new nuns come simply because they want to be a part of this incredible thing. These nuns need to study. It costs $500.00 each for the nuns to study the necessary theology. Also they have several nuns studying medicine. As Hermana Mercedes puts it, this is necessary if they want to continue once she is gone. They need additonal Hermana’s to be able to practice medicine! Leaving it all up to Hermana Mercedes with her other duties is simply not possible anymore as she gets older. Plus they are hoping to treat more children. Just like anywhere else in the world the study of Medicine is VERY expensive…. Right now like everyone else who studies the Hermana’s are running on loans. Loans are a common thing here…. loans for study, loans for food, loans for medicines, loans for refrigerators, loans for everything. Sometimes there simply aren’t any more loans… so there is no food…. so the kids eat but the Hermana’s do not. How is that ok? Imagine yourself under the care of a doctor that hasn’t eaten nor slept in 3 days? Would you be getting the best care? Would this concern you at all. You better believe it would! Not acceptable. There is so much about this that is not acceptable it shakes me to my core.

Hermana Mercedes explains through a grin that sometimes she has bought things with no idea how she would pay for them… she would simply pray as she walked into a store… She laughs as she tells of a time she walked out of a store with no idea how she would pay for the new fridge that was being loaded into her truck so she just smiled and continued to pray (FYI she still owes that store $16,000 Quetzals). Just a few months ago she said she was praying because the situation was becoming desperate…. then we walked through the gates. In her heart, she believes God sent us to her. Real people, bringing real hope. She said she and the other Hermana’s thank God every day for the people of Canada who gave money so that our team could come and help them. It never fails to amaze me how much the people of Guatemala feel for us. I come home and I feel terrible that I cannot do more… I am so humbled by this experience. It has changed me to my core so much for the better. It has changed who I am as a wife… as a mother… as a human being. I think the people around me sense it… see it.. and truly sometimes I think some people avoid me because of it for some unknown reason. But for me, words cannot describe how thankful I am for them and what they have done for ME and for my FAMILY!

Things stand in our way… politics, money, school, work and other obligations are at times less than accomodating to the work we wish to do in Guatemala. We have decided that nothing is going to stand in our way. We have pledged our support to the Hermana’s for many years to come and we have no intention on going back on that promise. To us Doppenberg’s a promise is something that can never be undone. We talked on the way home as a family about this promise and our entire family agrees that this is something that we MUST do. We will fundraise and continue to sacrifice ourselves to make that number of 200 grow each and every year. All I can ask is that you who are reading this help us… if not financially then through prayer and support. There is strength in numbers, that is for sure… Guatemalteco’s live by that… and it works beautifully… and I know it can for us as well. I know that God brought us to Ted and Wells of Hope so through him we could be brought to this place… I know that God put Fernando and his amazing family in our path so our work in a different area than Jalapa would be possible…. I know that God put the feeling into the hearts of each and every person that prayed, donated or accompanied us on our trip to help… I know that God will continue to help us in our future endeavours in Guatemala. As one of my favorite songs says: “And if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us… and if our God is with us, then what could stand against?…..” I know this in my heart and it gives me peace…. May Peace be with you as well….

Until next time….Dios le bendiga… (God bless you all).

Well here we are again…. Guatemala for the fourth time in 14 months. I am beginning to get the feeling that we like it here haha… This trip is not for work and for that I am thankful. We have spent so much time in this country and have seen very little of it and have not had the opportunity to be immersed in the culture at all. Last time we were here we spent most of our time in the town of El Progreso working at the Hospital Infantil Padre Pedro and we had the fortunate blessing of meeting Fernando. Fernando speaks english and welcomed us to his family home to meet his parents Senor Chico and Senora Vilma.

This time we checked into a hotel in El Progreso and went straight to Fernando’s family home. They welcomed us with open arms and hearts and this was the beginning of one of the best weeks of my life. Fernando took the entire week off work in order to be our escort and help us with the language barrier and to show us Guatemala and its culture. The purpose of this trip for us was multi-faceted…. Firstly we wanted to meet with Hermana Mercedes at the Hospital and get information on the hospital, how it runs and what urgent needs they have so we can begin our fundraising effort back home for our visit next year. Secondly we wanted to look at property so we can build a home here. The camp in Jalapa is simply too far away to suit our needs now since we feel called to serve here in El Progreso & Jutiapa. Thirdly we simply wanted to see some of Guatemala and as I said the culture here. Staying at camp in Jalapa still retains a “Canadian” feel to it and we really wanted to live as Guatemalteco’s (Guatemalan’s) for a while.

Throughout these 8 days we managed to realize all 3 of our goals and so much more!

Upon arriving at Fernando’s home we were treated to a traditional meal that was delicious! Senora Vilma made so many efforts to keep us safe in regards to food and her cooking. Her efforts paid off, and for that we are extremely grateful! In the entire week, no one got sick! And believe me, based on some of the ‘traditional’ things we ate this is nothing short of a miracle! Some of what we ate I can honestly say, I cannot believe we ate it hahahaha… some of which we liked, some of which made us almost gag but we tried our best to muddle through the tough times and eat it. Overall it was fantastic food and we felt so honoured that they welcomed us to share meals with them. We spent a great deal of time at Senor Chico’s home and ate many, many meals there. In Guatemalateco culture it is quite rare to be invited to someones home, especially for meals and it is an honour to be invited at all. Words cannot express the gratitude my family felt for being so included in this community. And they truly live as a community. If someone has a good day fishing, everyone partakes… if someone kills a cow, everyone partakes… Everyone helps, and everyone eats. If someone is ill, everyone prays and helps…. if someone’s roof leaks, everyone cleans the mess and helps fix the roof…. Get the picture? We have so much to learn from this culture… we need to return back to basic’s like this and take care of each other 1/2 as well as they do!!!

Our first day, Fernando told us that in the morning he was going to butcher a cow and a chicken so we could eat and then his family would sell the meat at very low prices to help feed his village. We had no idea what was in store for us in the morning.

We arrived at Fernando’s and off we went to pick up the cow in a nearby village. We had to walk the many mountainous acres looking for the grazing cow. A local ‘cowboy’ came with us because he is an expert in roping a cow. It took nearly no time at all and we were on our way back with the cow in the back of the man’s truck. After arriving back at Fernando’s there was a crowd of people there… within minutes they had the cow tied and the town butcher had the cow dead, right there on the front lawn…. To say we were shocked by this whole process would be quite the understatement. Next thing we knew they were skinning… cutting… etc etc etc… The women were wrapping the meat that was to be for sale. They waste nothing… and I mean nothing… even the stomach contents are emptied and taken away for fertilizer… hooves are put on the fire to burn away the outside and then boiled for soup…. Its truly the grossest (if thats even a word) and yet so incredible thing I’ve ever seen. The entire process took under 3 hours and the cow was simply gone… every single piece of it! They cut off the horns and put some kind of curing salt/calcium on the fleshy top and put it on the roof to dry… it is a gift meant for us and will be ready for us to take home next time we come. It was an honour to witness this and be included… and the gift of the horns is a sign of their love and respect for us.

Our kids were then invited to kill a chicken for us to eat for lunch…. Thus ensued the most crazy thing I have ever seen… I watched my 10 year old son kill a chicken with Senora Vilma’s help (no one else was willing to try haha). To actually understand how much these animals mean to this family… being their only source of food… its quite humbling…. As I said, Fernando’s family uses everything they have to help the poor in their village… they sell things for what people can afford to pay and if they cannot afford to pay then they are given what they need and someday they know those people will repay them at times they themselves are in need.

Throughout the week we tried to help Senoa Vilma cook, clean etc, as much as we could but she basically would not let us lift a finger. She served us as though we were royalty. This simply is the Guatemalteco way. To help her is insulting to her in this culture. The only time she ever let me do anything was to help her make the day’s tortilla’s that are eaten at every meal. Zack, Luke and Gabe helped her too. We stood in the kitchen and laughed until we cried because what would take her 3 seconds took us a minute and she still had to fix them and make them right. It was so much fun and I have to tell you, Senora Vilma loves to laugh. She laughs all the time and her joy is so contagious… I love her and it has made my desire to learn Spanish better all the stronger so I can communicate with her without Fernando always having to translate. In that matter I do have to say that I have learned more Spanish in my 8 days here than I have in my past 6 months of school. Fernando is so patient, as is everyone and they are teaching me the most useful Spanish I would learn no where else but here!

Later in the week Fernando and Senora Vilma took us to Esquipulas. It is a beautiful city about a 2 hour drive through some of the most breathtaking scenery I have ever witnessed in my many travels around the world. There is a 400+ year old Basillica of the black Christ. The statue of the black Christ was carved from a type of black wood and brought here from Spain over 400 years ago. People come from all over Latin America and the world to light a candle and say a prayer at the foot of the statue. When you have finished your prayer you walk backwards away from the statue as a sign of respect that Christ never turns His back on man so man should never turn his back on Christ. Its such a beautiful tradition and we all felt the solemn honour to have participated in this with the countless others that were there to pay respect. On the walkway leading to the statue there are these huge beautiful pieces of art, almost like mosaic’s made with tiny gold charms… each charm represents something that someone has received as a miracle after visiting the Basillica. There are hundreds of thousands of these charms… feet, hands, bodies, people’s loved ones coming to Christ etc etc etc.. the list goes on. We were all fascinated by these mosaics… humbled by the sheer multitude of miracles that these people have received. Perhaps in order to receive a miracle, one must simply have the faith that Christ can do anything…. Perhaps that is something that we sometimes tend to miss in our culture…. Are we too busy to see the miracles that happen every day? hmmmmmm……

Fernando also took us to look at property back in his village later in the week and after an exhausting day I will tell you that we do have one in mind now. It is about a 10 minute drive from Fernando’s house through a narrow road that is cobblestone in places and just a mess in others hahaha. Four wheel drive would be a bonus in most places here. The property itself sits up on a hillside/cliff of sorts and is quite beautiful with palm trees and a huge mango tree just down the cliff. On one side is a breathtaking view of the main mountain in El Progreso. This mountain is huge and it is widely believed here that by looking at it you can predict the weather. If the mountain has a cloud on top that does not move, it hovers, then the winds will come. Trust me when I tell you, we’ve spent enough time here to tell you that is 100% accurate! Our family has spent much time staring at this mountain and we all think it is one of the most beautiful things we have ever seen…. On the other side of the property there is a view of the valley and mountains on the horizon. The view is breathtaking and we could certainly see us enjoying living there while we serve. We have taken many pictures of this property and will take them home and think and pray. If God wants it to be, then it will be. We will begin saving money and if it is still available once we have enough saved then I believe it will happen… We shall see….

It’s strange, I feel that our story of Guatemala already has so many chapters and yet in so many ways it is just beginning…..So much more has happened on this trip… the most important being our meeting with Hermana Mercedes and the other sisters at the Hospital and our visit to the mountain villages of Jutiapa with them, but I am out of time and space so I shall say…..To be continued very soon, there is much more to tell….. stay tuned!

Well I guess I need to begin with an apology… I know many of my friends and family are quite frustrated with the lack of blogging from Guatemala… and for that I am sorry. I cannot however be sorry for the reason why there was the silence… lets just say that sheer exhaustion took over. My family and everyone in our group worked so hard to get everything done in the timeframe we had. That meant long days… most meals were grabbed on the way home at night from the Nutrition Centre and once we got back we would hang out for a little while and then one by one trickle off to bed. I think the latest I stayed up was just after 11pm once. Most nights it was crash by 9pm. The drive from camp to El Progresso was just over an hour one way and that took a toll on all of us as well. Keep in mind the roads are rough, winding and with many changes in elevation. Guatemala sure puts the human body through its paces… well perhaps its more doing Guatemala Doppenberg style that has a bit to do with it lol.

Hmmm where to begin? How about one more apology… this is 1 month worth of blogs in 1 so it may be pretty long… Read it in shifts if you must haha…Well last you heard I had said my painful mental goodbye to Estuardo from the Malnutrition Hospital. I have to tell you, there is much more to this story… Its funny, in one of our many evening conversations at camp our eldest son Zack said: “I don’t really go to youth at the church anymore, I find it sort of lame for me… I don’t feel God there like everyone else seems to…. I feel God here in Guatemala… Its where I know He is for me.”…. In so many ways, I agree with him. I get very overwhelmed by life here at home and bogged down in such un-necessary worries etc that, if I am honest, I go through the motions of faith a very large part of the time. Sometimes I don’t even realize I am dead inside until I get to a place like Guatemala and even though life is busy with doing our work there, we are very aware of God and how He is working in our lives. It all just seems more obvious… Anyway, a couple of days after our sad visit to the hospital we went to Yolanda’s village. Rachel had brought some toys etc she wanted to give away and if you’ve followed my blog for our last trip you know that Yolanda’s village is my version of Disney World. Kids of all ages rush to you and they are all happy and so thankful to have visitors. As soon as we got there I recognized so many faces from last year. They recognized us as well. What began as 10 kids quickly multiplied into 40 +. Within seconds the kids were climbing on us, hugging us, grabbing our hands to take us to see friends and family members etc. One little girl who I recognized from my favourite profile picture came up to me and hugged me. It was an awkward hug because she had a bundle in her arms. That bundle was a tiny baby. I asked her how old this precious little baby was and she said he was uno mes (one month)…. She put him into my arms and I couldn’t help but already love this tiny little sleeping baby. I asked her what his name was…. when she told me I was so taken aback I had to ask her to repeat it. I repeated it back to her just to be sure I wasn’t crazy. His name was Estuardo…. born around the exact same time that my Estuardo passed away. Instantly my eyes filled with tears…. A feeling of happiness came over me…. I had been quite sad inside and been overwhelmed by a feeling of hopelessness after finding out my Estuardo passed away and instantly that was gone. God gave me a gift in that moment. The gift of Hope. I quietly whispered to Geoff that the baby’s name was Estuardo… Geoff was shocked in his own way… I looked across the yard to see Rachel and the others being mobbed by kids. Rachel and I locked eyes and she came toward me. As soon as I told her this little miracles name she too was shocked in a good way. Everyone knew that this was totally God showing Himself to me so I would have renewed hope. It’s these moments more than any that are the reason I love Guatemala so much.

The next weeks work wise were fairly much the same day in, day out. We were joined by Dave, Sarah and Jenn just under a week into our trip. The day after they arrived we began our intense work schedule, having used the week prior to their arrival to set up everything and get materials ordered. The first few days were devoted to going up the mountain to deliver bricks so Martin (the builder) could begin construction on the adobe mud brick home we were building for Mynor and his family. Mynor’s daughter Lisbia we met last year has undergone 1 of the 2 operations to fix a cleft palate and we hope she gets the other operation soon! Within a few hours of beginning to carry those adobe bricks (which I will say, I had forgotten how much I despise carrying those heavy, awkward things), I put one down in an area and I must have just been in the wrong place at the wrong time because I didn’t notice the ones behind were falling like dominoes…. I may not have seen it coming, but I sure felt it when it crushed my knuckle. When I looked at my hand at first I was kind of shocked. Zack was beside me and he screamed to Geoff that he was pretty sure “mom just broke her knuckles”. The blood and swelling made it look much worse than it actually was and although I was out of commission for the rest of the afternoon as far as carrying was concerned I was fine the next day. It hurt still… and kind of still does at times but overall it was a near miss! Whew!

After Martin had all the bricks he needed we were off to El Progresso and to our work on the Hospital Infantil Padre Pedro. Day in and day out there we painted, replaced roofs and remodelled a bathroom. Frank and Laurie from Southridge and Ryan & Pete from Toronto joined our team a few days into work there and were truly a Godsend! Frank worked so hard on that bathroom that had he not been there Im sure the work in there wouldn’t have gotten done in time. Laurie truly was our painting superstar and truly showed how awesome she is by volunteering to paint the Rojo Oxido, which was a terrible, pudding consistency red paint that was used for bottom trim and a multitude of metal bars that were tedious beyond your wildest imagination. All of us harboured a special hatred for that red paint…. and I truly am surprised we survived that experience ahahaha. The building, the windows, the bars, the gates all did get painted and it truly looks fantastic even considering none of us are professionals! Ryan, Peter, Geoff and Zack set out to work on replacing the 2 roofs that we raised money for. So many more roofs need to be replaced there but this was a great start! One roof was a huge undertaking because large heavy panels of asbestos needed to be removed and then metal panels put on it its place. The metal roof panels in Guatemala are much thinner than here and just as the guys began to work with it, out of no where the wind began. It made doing the roofing very dangerous not only because of gusts on the roof making life hazardous but also because if the wind caught one of those panels it would act like a razor blade and slice any exposed skin to ribbons. Ryan was the first victim and gashed himself pretty badly. I have to send a shout out to Pete and Ryan… truly our roofing superstars as well… Game ball for roofing goes to you guys! There were issues, problems and fatigue throughout the weeks… It all got done though… the roofs are done…. and the painting is done. We called in reinforcements in the form of Ed and Andy from another team to join us one day because the plumbing and electrical at the nutrition hospital was a total Guatemalan nightmare. They did an amazing job figuring it all out for us in the 1 day they were there and we were able to continue and complete the bathroom on the very last day there. Just under the wire but we did it! Funny part was having Hermana Veronica leading me around by the hand showing me other things that needed to be done as if we would never return. The poor woman doesn’t understand out commitment… I assured her that we would return next year and the year after, and the year after etc etc haha. Hermana Mercedes and all the sisters were very pleased with everything we did and are compiling a list for next time! Thanks to everyone who helped and donated money…. thanks to all of you, the hospital has a functional bathroom for bathing babies now, 2 new roofs to keep those kids and sisters healthy and dry…. and a like new building that is bright and will help promote hope and healing for the families and children at the hospital!

I’m going to take a little time now and tell you about another couple of miracles that occurred for us in our time in Guatemala. You see, I took Phase 1 Spanish at Niagara College before our trip. Phase 1 provides you with a very minimal base of the language… It does not prepare you to talk with anyone lol. You can order a drink in a restaurant but not drywall at a bodega. We were lost, confused and generally in some serious trouble. That’s when God stepped in and sent Geoff to a paint store. In that paint store as Geoff struggled, God sent Fernando out of the back room…. Fernando speaks amazing english and as they say, the rest is history. Fernando lived in an English speaking country for years and returned home to help his retired parents. We formed a very strong friendship with Fernando… we went out for dinners with him… he took us to his home and we met his parents and quite quickly became like family to us. His amazing mother made a traditional meal of Guatemalan tamales (which just happen to be my favourite food after trying them for the first time last year), which are not easy to make and are therefore saved for very special occasions like Christmas etc. What an awesome time we had with Fernando and his family. We rode horses, talked, toured and laughed for hours. It truly was a time all of us will cherish in our memories and hearts forever! I know in my heart that we have made lifelong friends now in Guatemala and we will be heading back to visit them asap.

Now, the best part of all…. Last year there was a family that lived at camp… Mynor, Vicenta, Dinora (Claudia), Mainitor, Moso, Lusvin and Jose David. Im sure you have seen my pictures of my boys with their kids. They played and our families truly cared for one another. Claudia would greet us every morning with a smile and a hug… some of our team and family worked with her helping her to learn English. Our boys and their boys played and laughed so much together despite the language barrier. Truly it was an honour to get to know them. Sometime after our last visit the family left camp and moved to Jalapa. Everyone from camp lost touch with them. When we arrived this time our first question to Mario and his family (the new family that lives at camp) was if anyone knew where Mynor and his family had moved. No one knew. Our boys (and quite frankly us) were devastated. It became our personal mission to find the family. One Saturday afternoon we drove around Jalapa for hours searching and searching but to no avail. Jalapa is not a huge city but it is still pretty large and trying to find a few people is comparable to the proverbial needle in a haystack. Geoff and I resigned ourselves that this family was lost to us… That Monday morning Geoff and Zack had to go into Jalapa to order wood needed for the house that was being built up in the mountain (which by the way is being built for a different Mynor). Zack and Geoff were talking and all of a sudden out of the corner of his eye Zack spotted the Mynor we had been looking for! He screamed for Geoff to pull over and apparently the reunion was the stuff of movies! Just when we had given up, God put Mynor and our van on some random street in Jalapa…. as if to say…. Never, EVER give up Hope! Have I not shown you before what I can do?

Later that day we set out to visit the family. Me and the little guys couldn’t wait to see them! When we got there it was like a reunion of best friends that hadn’t seen each other in years. Claudia for me was the most special. As it turned out it was her 13th birthday and when she saw me she threw herself into my arms and didn’t let go for a very long time. Once my tear filled eyes dried enough to look around I was astounded by the living conditions this family had to endure. There was 1 room with several beds and a few blankets… then a kitchen/living area that only had 1/2 a roof on it. The rest was totally open to the elements! It became obvious to me that this was an old workshop of sorts that was now being rented as a home. To be totally honest, the adobe mud brick huts up in the mountain are better then this!!! In as gentle a way as possible without hurting Mynor’s pride we asked him if we could help him in some way. He was totally receptive to the idea, and I thank God for that. I could not sleep at night knowing that this family was living like that… we knew we had to do something! Claudia chatted on in Spanish and even though I could only catch a few words per sentence I figured out enough that she was ready to attend school taking some courses equivalent to our ‘college’ for computers so she could get a job. She asked if we could help her get her computer working so she could go. She brought out the computer and it was the largest, clunkiest, oldest computer I had seen… (and trust me, I learned on a commodore 64… no windows, only dos). I told her that there was no way that was going to get fixed… not by us anyway… I felt awful. When we left Mynor’s home I cried yet again. I didn’t understand how any of the stuff I have seen in Guatemala is fair. We have so much… others have so little… I simply don’t understand the world and how it spins sometimes so wildly out of sync. For the next weeks, we visited Mynor and his family several times. Each time we brought lamina to help close in his roof… blankets for the children to be warm at night… money from us to fix his motorcycle so he can work….metal to build a chimney so his stove smoke won’t choke the baby…. food…. prayers, hugs, support and encouragement!

During our last week we decided to talk to our team…. What did they think about putting some money together to buy Claudia a new laptop? Fernando, our new friend had done some searching and found a small mini laptop for $250.00 USD. Everyone without question was in. Everyone understood that if Claudia gets a useful education she can get a good job and help support her family. That is the goal of every family in Guatemala… do whatever it takes to take care of each other because family is everything! It truly is a blessing to watch unfold. That night, we all piled in the truck… all our team and Ed and Andy from the other team and headed to Mynor’s. Once inside I had the privilege of presenting Claudia with a note, handwritten in English… signed by everyone… translated into Spanish by Fernando and the box containing her new computer. She began to sob before she even opened the box. She clung to me crying… I held it together long enough for her to say a choked “gracias” and then we just stood there together holding each other. Looking over at her dad standing behind everyone I could see the tears in his eyes. We all left, with a feeling that is indescribable. Geoff hung back and as we all piled into the van, Mynor was clinging to Geoff, unable to speak he was crying so much. It truly was quite a moment. We saw the family one more time just before we left Guatemala. It was sad to say ‘adios’… but I know its not goodbye now. I left Claudia all my contact information so she can email me once she gets into school and figures out email. Mynor stopped us before we left and presented us with a handwritten letter that I have sitting beside me right now. It says words like… “pain”… “tears”…. “new hope”… “blessing” …. Once I got the letter translated it made my cry yet again…. it was one of the most heartfelt things I had ever read. It was as though just when I think I know and understand why God has placed Guatemala so firmly into my families hearts something else springs up to let me in on a new reason… a new hope… a new spirit. I will cherish the people I’ve met, that letter, the pictures, video and the memories I have from Guatemala forever.

People ask me all the time why we do what we do…. I always say I honestly do not know why…. I just know that I will continue to do it as long as I am physically able. There is something about my life right now that just feels right. Like my life pre-Guatemala was missing something and now its been filled. I cannot explain it any better than that…. I know when I am home there is a piece of my heart that seems to be missing… like I am only whole and complete when I am there with my family doing what we do. There was a news crew at the hospital one day wanting to interview us…. my lovely team threw me under the bus and nominated me since I knew more spanish than any of them haha… The last question the man asked me was: “Why do you do this work here in Guatemala?”… I struggled to think of an answer in English, never mind translate it into Spanish …. I said the first thing that came into my head…. “Porque Jesucristo!” … Because of Jesus Christ. ….. You know what… that answer works for me!

Thanks so much again for all the prayers and support…. All of you who donated money, time, sweat, tears, prayers, thoughts, love etc…. You will never understand how much it all means to me, my family and the people who’s lives you’ve touched. Until next time…. (and who knows it could be sooner than you think…. )…. Dios te bendiga (God Bless You)…. Rita… and Geoff, Zachary, Lucas and Gabriel.. xoxo